Do you live in a peaceful home? Or do you and your spouse seem to argue and yell about everything? Did you know there is something you can do in your relationship that can transform it from contentious to serene?
Early in our dating relationship, my wife and I set one ground rule for how we would handle disagreements and any other problems that arose. That rule was very simple -- we were not allowed to yell at each other.
Of course, we broke the rule periodically. But because we knew it was unacceptable, doing so caused pretty serious consequences. I remember one time I raised my voice at my wife and it literally stunned her. I could tell by her reaction that I had crossed the line.
Through the years, this rule has stuck. But not only that, it has really guided our relationship with each other (and even with our children). Why? Because we learned that yelling at each other was disrespectful and degrading. We also hated that it seemed to make the problem we were dealing with even worse. It showed that we were willing to drive the other person down in order to get our point across.
It also encouraged a "win at all costs" attitude, which is selfish at its core. And, when we did yell, it never solved any of our problems with a godly solution. If I won an argument by yelling, the outcome was rarely biblical. One thing I noticed about my own heart was that yelling was a way to distract her from the real problem. This was a big problem when I knew she was right, but I was not willing to admit my own fault.
While the rule started out as a law in our relationship, it has become a real desire and expression of grace. It has taken time, but the law actually taught us about grace in ways we never expected. It wasn't until a few years after making the rule that I read James 4:1: "What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you?"
So the next time you feel your tone of voice getting out of control, ask yourself if your passions are taking over or if you're solving the problem with your spouse's best interest and, more importantly, the Lord's will at heart. Doing so can do wonders for the emotional climate of your home.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleStreet.com/
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Is Your Spouse an Easy Target for an Affair? Even If You Say "No," Read This...
Do you ever take your spouse for granted? Do you ever say, "My spouse would never cheat on me?" If so, you need to be careful. Here's why...
Many affairs come completely out of the blue. They happen to those who least expect it. And many of them happen to people you would least expect. I once heard a woman who had an affair say, "I wasn't looking to have an affair. And I never dreamed I would fall into one. It just happened."
Well, it didn't just happen. It is possible she never thought about it. But the affair happened because she didn't have her guard up. Any time you say, "I'll never have an affair" or "I'm sure my spouse would never have an affair," it's a clear sign that you've become apathetic toward sin -- and don't fully understand its power.
1 Peter 5:8 says, "Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour." If you let your guard down, you become a prime target for sin to creep in. The devil loves it when you become apathetic and take things for granted.
But even worse than apathy is the self-righteousness these thoughts produce. They are a sign that we think we (or our spouse or someone else) is above sin and unable to fall into sin. And that simply isn't true.
Remember, God's strength is best exhibited in our weakness. So when we acknowledge our weakness and how easy it would be for us to fall into sin, we are far more likely to remain dependent on God and His watchful protection.
Admitting our weakness also shows that we are "sober-minded." We understand the reality of our situation and our powerlessness in the face of temptation. It's in this weakness that God's power is made evident.
As a spouse, you have to stay on guard for your loved one. While you can't prevent someone else from giving into temptation, there are some things you can do help them stay faithful. You can show your spouse consistent devotion. And you can serve them with your words and deeds.
Remember, your spouse is human. They need to be built up and encouraged. Tearing them down all the time is a sure way to drive them away. If you provide the right kind of environment, any temptation to infidelity is far less prone to take root, much less grow into maturity.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleStreet.com/
Many affairs come completely out of the blue. They happen to those who least expect it. And many of them happen to people you would least expect. I once heard a woman who had an affair say, "I wasn't looking to have an affair. And I never dreamed I would fall into one. It just happened."
Well, it didn't just happen. It is possible she never thought about it. But the affair happened because she didn't have her guard up. Any time you say, "I'll never have an affair" or "I'm sure my spouse would never have an affair," it's a clear sign that you've become apathetic toward sin -- and don't fully understand its power.
1 Peter 5:8 says, "Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour." If you let your guard down, you become a prime target for sin to creep in. The devil loves it when you become apathetic and take things for granted.
But even worse than apathy is the self-righteousness these thoughts produce. They are a sign that we think we (or our spouse or someone else) is above sin and unable to fall into sin. And that simply isn't true.
Remember, God's strength is best exhibited in our weakness. So when we acknowledge our weakness and how easy it would be for us to fall into sin, we are far more likely to remain dependent on God and His watchful protection.
Admitting our weakness also shows that we are "sober-minded." We understand the reality of our situation and our powerlessness in the face of temptation. It's in this weakness that God's power is made evident.
As a spouse, you have to stay on guard for your loved one. While you can't prevent someone else from giving into temptation, there are some things you can do help them stay faithful. You can show your spouse consistent devotion. And you can serve them with your words and deeds.
Remember, your spouse is human. They need to be built up and encouraged. Tearing them down all the time is a sure way to drive them away. If you provide the right kind of environment, any temptation to infidelity is far less prone to take root, much less grow into maturity.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleStreet.com/
3 Ways to Get Your Husband to Talk to You
A study that found that most women want their husbands to talk to them. The desire is so great, that the majority of women said this was more important to them than sex, money, or children. So how can a woman get her husband to talk to her?
It's a tricky question, because the very nature of the question makes it sound like you can manipulate your husband into talking. Well, that's not the right way to go about it. You can't simply make someone talk if he doesn't want to. In fact, if you try, you're more likely to drive him away than you are to find success.
But that doesn't mean you're stuck doing nothing. There are, in fact, many things you can do to encourage him to talk. Let's look at three of them.
(1) Pray -- This seems obvious, but most people pray according to their own desires, not according to their husband's greatest need. In other words, do your prayers sound something like this, "Lord, please make my husband talk to me." If they do, then you know your prayers are focused on you and not on your husband.
The next time you pray for your husband, try this instead: Pray for his relationship with God. If he's not talking to you, then he's not leading you and your family. He's not fulfilling his duty as the spiritual leader of the home. So his relationship with God isn't where it needs to be. You can't force your husband to have a right relationship with God, but you can pray for him. So pray and trust God.
Once he gets his relationship with God in order, you'll be amazed at the difference in his willingness to talk. It probably won't come all at once, though, so be patient.
(2) Give up control -- Remember what happened in the Garden of Eden after Adam and Eve fell? The curse against the woman was that she would desire her husband. Another way to think of this is that the woman would desire to control her husband. A major reason a man refuses to talk to his wife is because it's his way of maintaining control of an area of his life. The minute he opens his mouth about it, a controlling wife will instantly take control of it. So he remains quiet.
Many wives don't realize they're controlling. The best way to discover what your husband thinks is to ask him if you're controlling. But be prepared for an answer you may not like. And don't get defensive. Listen closely to what he says. You might learn something about why he doesn't talk to you.
If a controlling wife wants her husband to talk, she has to give up control. She can start by repenting and asking God and her husband for forgiveness.
Then she needs to take the focus off of what he's not doing and turn her attention to what he is doing. Encourage him, praise him, and find ways to build him up. Use Philippians 4:8 as an outline for action: "whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things."
(3) Study your husband -- Who does your husband talk to? Why does he talk to them? What does he get from them? By studying your husband's conversation habits, you might discover some things you're not offering him in your discussions with him.
Also consider what really turns him on. What are his interests? Try to learn more about those interests and talk to him about them. Remember, the goal here is to start a habit of conversation. So even if it doesn't go very deep, at least you're getting him to talk.
Finally, study his strengths and weaknesses. How can you encourage the areas where he's strong? And how can you help out where he's weak? Service will go a long way toward starting conversation.
Every man is different. And the reasons they don't talk are just as varied. But these three principles will help you focus on the real priorities.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleStreet.com/
It's a tricky question, because the very nature of the question makes it sound like you can manipulate your husband into talking. Well, that's not the right way to go about it. You can't simply make someone talk if he doesn't want to. In fact, if you try, you're more likely to drive him away than you are to find success.
But that doesn't mean you're stuck doing nothing. There are, in fact, many things you can do to encourage him to talk. Let's look at three of them.
(1) Pray -- This seems obvious, but most people pray according to their own desires, not according to their husband's greatest need. In other words, do your prayers sound something like this, "Lord, please make my husband talk to me." If they do, then you know your prayers are focused on you and not on your husband.
The next time you pray for your husband, try this instead: Pray for his relationship with God. If he's not talking to you, then he's not leading you and your family. He's not fulfilling his duty as the spiritual leader of the home. So his relationship with God isn't where it needs to be. You can't force your husband to have a right relationship with God, but you can pray for him. So pray and trust God.
Once he gets his relationship with God in order, you'll be amazed at the difference in his willingness to talk. It probably won't come all at once, though, so be patient.
(2) Give up control -- Remember what happened in the Garden of Eden after Adam and Eve fell? The curse against the woman was that she would desire her husband. Another way to think of this is that the woman would desire to control her husband. A major reason a man refuses to talk to his wife is because it's his way of maintaining control of an area of his life. The minute he opens his mouth about it, a controlling wife will instantly take control of it. So he remains quiet.
Many wives don't realize they're controlling. The best way to discover what your husband thinks is to ask him if you're controlling. But be prepared for an answer you may not like. And don't get defensive. Listen closely to what he says. You might learn something about why he doesn't talk to you.
If a controlling wife wants her husband to talk, she has to give up control. She can start by repenting and asking God and her husband for forgiveness.
Then she needs to take the focus off of what he's not doing and turn her attention to what he is doing. Encourage him, praise him, and find ways to build him up. Use Philippians 4:8 as an outline for action: "whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things."
(3) Study your husband -- Who does your husband talk to? Why does he talk to them? What does he get from them? By studying your husband's conversation habits, you might discover some things you're not offering him in your discussions with him.
Also consider what really turns him on. What are his interests? Try to learn more about those interests and talk to him about them. Remember, the goal here is to start a habit of conversation. So even if it doesn't go very deep, at least you're getting him to talk.
Finally, study his strengths and weaknesses. How can you encourage the areas where he's strong? And how can you help out where he's weak? Service will go a long way toward starting conversation.
Every man is different. And the reasons they don't talk are just as varied. But these three principles will help you focus on the real priorities.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleStreet.com/
Monday, August 10, 2009
The Romance Of A Beach Wedding
How romantic can a beach wedding ceremony be? What better way to say 'I love you' than with the sand running between your toes? It's all true; a beach wedding is beautiful, romantic and picturesque. But they have their problems too.
So where are you intending to have your wedding? Is it a Caribbean beach wedding or a Hawaii beach wedding or maybe your intending to have a Florida beach wedding? It doesn't really matter which divine tropical location you're going to have your ocean theme wedding at, they all have one thing in common. They are all warm to hot and that can play merry hell with your choice of clothes. It's not much good wearing a really beautiful gown only to have hideous wet marks from heat induced sweat ruining the look and all the photos. So wear something appropriate and pick the cooler morning or late afternoon for the beach wedding ceremony. Wear something light and loose in natural materials, for instance cotton, and for the men (who sweat more) suggest under vests to absorb the sweat and keep them feeling cooler and dryer during the ceremony.
Wind and The Beach Wedding Ceremony
Remember that it is an outdoor wedding and therefore you are at the mercy of the elements. Mostly in the tropics, they are at least predictable and can be worked around. For instance remember it may well be windy so don't have things that are easily blown around as part of the decor of your reception. And make sure that things like the centrepieces are heavy enough to stay where they are put. Use lovely heavy glass vases or add a layer of sand inside the containers to increase their weight. And you can outline the path to your beach wedding ceremony with stones or sea shells to give even more of a marinefeeling to your ceremony.
And don't forget to be prepared for the worst. Just in case the weather should turn to rain have a back up room in the venue which you can use so the wedding can happily proceed. Make sure the guests are fully informed of what is happening before the time arrives.
The Unity Sand Ceremony
Another idea is to have the more traditional Unity Candle Ceremony replaced by the Unity Sand Ceremony. At your beach wedding, you can even scoop up the sand at your feet to use in the ceremony and as a permanent souvenir of the glorious beach where you had your beach wedding ceremony. It also solves the problem of the wind blowing the Unity Candle out.
The Unity Sand Ceremony is a ceremony a couple of minutes long during which the bride and groom pour sand into a Unity Vase from a separate container each and is really well suited to a beach wedding. This symbolizes their two separate lives coming together, being joined and continuing on as one. It is a simple, beautiful and heart felt ceremony. Other family members, particularly children of the couple, are also able to join in and feel part of the beach wedding ceremony.
An outdoor wedding site can be pretty noisy with wind, surf, birds and maybe other happy people if you are on a public beach. So ensure that there is some kind of public address system so you can be heard taking your vows.
Soft Sand and High Heels
Soft sand can be difficult for the elderly or disabled to walk on. And it can be a real challenge for high heels. For yourself consider sandals or bare feet for your beach wedding, it's wonderful feeling the sand squidging up between your toes. And for your guests, seriously consider getting some flooring for the seating and tables to prevent them from sinking into the sand.
Keep the ocean theme flowing through the food you serve. Use sea shells or abalone shells to serve seafoods in. Have a Hawaiian pit roast or a BBQ instead of a 'normal' meal. And for the cake, have it laced with dark or heavy rum as they do in the West Indies.
We may have made the idea of a beach wedding sound as if it has insurmountable problems. But this is not really so. At least no more so than any wedding has challenges to over come. With a little planning, your event can be a true high light of your life.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleStreet.com/
So where are you intending to have your wedding? Is it a Caribbean beach wedding or a Hawaii beach wedding or maybe your intending to have a Florida beach wedding? It doesn't really matter which divine tropical location you're going to have your ocean theme wedding at, they all have one thing in common. They are all warm to hot and that can play merry hell with your choice of clothes. It's not much good wearing a really beautiful gown only to have hideous wet marks from heat induced sweat ruining the look and all the photos. So wear something appropriate and pick the cooler morning or late afternoon for the beach wedding ceremony. Wear something light and loose in natural materials, for instance cotton, and for the men (who sweat more) suggest under vests to absorb the sweat and keep them feeling cooler and dryer during the ceremony.
Wind and The Beach Wedding Ceremony
Remember that it is an outdoor wedding and therefore you are at the mercy of the elements. Mostly in the tropics, they are at least predictable and can be worked around. For instance remember it may well be windy so don't have things that are easily blown around as part of the decor of your reception. And make sure that things like the centrepieces are heavy enough to stay where they are put. Use lovely heavy glass vases or add a layer of sand inside the containers to increase their weight. And you can outline the path to your beach wedding ceremony with stones or sea shells to give even more of a marinefeeling to your ceremony.
And don't forget to be prepared for the worst. Just in case the weather should turn to rain have a back up room in the venue which you can use so the wedding can happily proceed. Make sure the guests are fully informed of what is happening before the time arrives.
The Unity Sand Ceremony
Another idea is to have the more traditional Unity Candle Ceremony replaced by the Unity Sand Ceremony. At your beach wedding, you can even scoop up the sand at your feet to use in the ceremony and as a permanent souvenir of the glorious beach where you had your beach wedding ceremony. It also solves the problem of the wind blowing the Unity Candle out.
The Unity Sand Ceremony is a ceremony a couple of minutes long during which the bride and groom pour sand into a Unity Vase from a separate container each and is really well suited to a beach wedding. This symbolizes their two separate lives coming together, being joined and continuing on as one. It is a simple, beautiful and heart felt ceremony. Other family members, particularly children of the couple, are also able to join in and feel part of the beach wedding ceremony.
An outdoor wedding site can be pretty noisy with wind, surf, birds and maybe other happy people if you are on a public beach. So ensure that there is some kind of public address system so you can be heard taking your vows.
Soft Sand and High Heels
Soft sand can be difficult for the elderly or disabled to walk on. And it can be a real challenge for high heels. For yourself consider sandals or bare feet for your beach wedding, it's wonderful feeling the sand squidging up between your toes. And for your guests, seriously consider getting some flooring for the seating and tables to prevent them from sinking into the sand.
Keep the ocean theme flowing through the food you serve. Use sea shells or abalone shells to serve seafoods in. Have a Hawaiian pit roast or a BBQ instead of a 'normal' meal. And for the cake, have it laced with dark or heavy rum as they do in the West Indies.
We may have made the idea of a beach wedding sound as if it has insurmountable problems. But this is not really so. At least no more so than any wedding has challenges to over come. With a little planning, your event can be a true high light of your life.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleStreet.com/
Graphology and Lover's Compatibility
Very few people are blessed with the art of discovering accurately how compatible they are with their partners and that too without seeking any professional help. This can be done by analyzing their handwriting. Moreover, it has also been proved that handwriting is full of relationship clues which clearly reveal the degree of compatibility in a relationship.The final edition related to the degree of compatibility of your pair.
Flow
Both writings are graceful with few corrections and erasures: Your pair moves on well.
One writing is graceful and one arrhythmic: A combination which can well be saved by the sense of humor. You are bound to bump into one another by stepping onto each other's toe.
Both are arrhythmic: Your pair can be comical and heartbreaking.
Self-Image
Both with retraced Ts and Ds: You will adhere to certain standards for acquiring a self image and will feel uncomfortable unless and until those standards are met.
Both without retraced Ts and Ds: You people may go off in any direction unauthorized by anyone.
One with retraced Ts and Ds and one without: One may disapprove of the conduct, dress or language of the other, and also will be embarrassed by undignified situations.
Bonding
One with round dots over Is and Js: This pair forms long and strong bonds with people, values and beliefs.
One with round dots over Is and Js and the other without: One feels secured and bonded; while the other feels unsecured and unbounded.
Both without rounded dots: Neither bonds easily and your relationship may slip away.
Simplicity
Both without beginning approach strokes: Both of you never waste time on hesitations. You strip away unnecessarily. Your thinking is uncomplicated and at times can also be elegant. In business, science, art and music, the two of you can be a good combination.
One with approach strokes and one without: This combination gets place by a more circuitous route.
Both without approach strokes: You tend to beat around the bush.
Generosity
Both with final strokes that are long and turn upwards: Both of you are kind, seldom, spiteful and open-minded.
One with long upturn final strokes and one without: This is a nice combo, especially, if the less generous one is able to accept generosity gracefully.
Both without long, slightly upward final strokes: With this pairing, sharing is not always easy, and one may need something which the other has, that something may be denied.
Self-Reliance
Both underscore their signature: You do things well independently. You can be a successful business combo.
One with underscored signature and one without: This combo too, works well.
Sexual Loop Guide
Both with long lower loops of Gs, Ys and Js that return to the baseline: In lovemaking, you are likely to be active and play the normal 'sex roles.'
Both with long lower loops that fail to return to the baseline: You both are willing to make love, but you tend to get to everything very prematurely.
Both with strange, oddly shaped loops: You are beyond kinky.
Both with exaggerated lower loops: You are led by fascination and genitalia.
Both with short, straight G, Y and J loops: This pair would rather see a G-rated movie.
Both with exaggerated lower loops in relation to the rest of writing: Both of you may find sexual satisfaction in fantasy and neither of you may need to have fun with the other.
Both with no lower loops at all: You treat human sexuality as a simple reproductive function that can be made effective and productive.
Both with narrow, squeezed lower loops that return to the baseline: This pair is sexually inhibited by fear of trusting.
Both with a variety of lower loops: Both of you do a lot of sexual research and investigation.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleStreet.com/
About the Author
Abhishek owns MysticBoard.com. http://www.mysticboard.com is the place where she can be consulted and contacted. In the website Graphology
Flow
Both writings are graceful with few corrections and erasures: Your pair moves on well.
One writing is graceful and one arrhythmic: A combination which can well be saved by the sense of humor. You are bound to bump into one another by stepping onto each other's toe.
Both are arrhythmic: Your pair can be comical and heartbreaking.
Self-Image
Both with retraced Ts and Ds: You will adhere to certain standards for acquiring a self image and will feel uncomfortable unless and until those standards are met.
Both without retraced Ts and Ds: You people may go off in any direction unauthorized by anyone.
One with retraced Ts and Ds and one without: One may disapprove of the conduct, dress or language of the other, and also will be embarrassed by undignified situations.
Bonding
One with round dots over Is and Js: This pair forms long and strong bonds with people, values and beliefs.
One with round dots over Is and Js and the other without: One feels secured and bonded; while the other feels unsecured and unbounded.
Both without rounded dots: Neither bonds easily and your relationship may slip away.
Simplicity
Both without beginning approach strokes: Both of you never waste time on hesitations. You strip away unnecessarily. Your thinking is uncomplicated and at times can also be elegant. In business, science, art and music, the two of you can be a good combination.
One with approach strokes and one without: This combination gets place by a more circuitous route.
Both without approach strokes: You tend to beat around the bush.
Generosity
Both with final strokes that are long and turn upwards: Both of you are kind, seldom, spiteful and open-minded.
One with long upturn final strokes and one without: This is a nice combo, especially, if the less generous one is able to accept generosity gracefully.
Both without long, slightly upward final strokes: With this pairing, sharing is not always easy, and one may need something which the other has, that something may be denied.
Self-Reliance
Both underscore their signature: You do things well independently. You can be a successful business combo.
One with underscored signature and one without: This combo too, works well.
Sexual Loop Guide
Both with long lower loops of Gs, Ys and Js that return to the baseline: In lovemaking, you are likely to be active and play the normal 'sex roles.'
Both with long lower loops that fail to return to the baseline: You both are willing to make love, but you tend to get to everything very prematurely.
Both with strange, oddly shaped loops: You are beyond kinky.
Both with exaggerated lower loops: You are led by fascination and genitalia.
Both with short, straight G, Y and J loops: This pair would rather see a G-rated movie.
Both with exaggerated lower loops in relation to the rest of writing: Both of you may find sexual satisfaction in fantasy and neither of you may need to have fun with the other.
Both with no lower loops at all: You treat human sexuality as a simple reproductive function that can be made effective and productive.
Both with narrow, squeezed lower loops that return to the baseline: This pair is sexually inhibited by fear of trusting.
Both with a variety of lower loops: Both of you do a lot of sexual research and investigation.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleStreet.com/
About the Author
Abhishek owns MysticBoard.com. http://www.mysticboard.com is the place where she can be consulted and contacted. In the website Graphology
Lord, I'm Ready to be a Wife
Most people don't believe in "‘till death do us part," anymore.
Christine Pembleton believes she knows the secret to making your marriage last. In her book, Lord, I'm Ready to be a Wife (www.christinepembleton.com) (Josephine Communications); she shares her views of how to become a good Christian wife and the importance of finding the right man to marry.
There are 3 types of unmarried women, according to Pembleton. The single woman who is living her life for herself, the "married" unmarried woman who gives her boyfriends all the benefits of marriage without the commitment, and the "wife-in-waiting" who is ready to be a wife, but waiting until the actual marriage to act like one.
The single, unmarried woman lives her life the way she wants to. Any man she meets must fit himself into her life.
"This mindset preserves her life as a single woman and it works to keep her life where it should be - a life that fulfills her God-given destiny," she said.
The unmarried "married" woman acts as though she is married, but without the commitment. She washes his clothes, cooks his meals and may even engage in pre-marital sex because she loves him and wants to give him everything he "needs."
"She bases her life choices on what's important to him and his goals," she said.
The "wife-in-waiting" has a life of her own, but is flexible enough to meet her future husband partway in order to build a life together. She is willing to make huge adjustments in her life, but only for the benefit of a marriage license. It is the "wife-in-waiting" that a woman looking for a good Christian marriage should strive to be.
"A wife-in-waiting may wait a little longer for her husband and be frustrated with how
many men will try to challenge her standards," she said. "But when she meets a man who wants to be a husband to her, she'll have the best chance of having a happy marriage. And enjoying being a wife to one man, the man she'll prayerfully share the rest of her life with."
Pembleton believes that it is not enough to have the right mind-set to have a happy marriage; you must also make sure you choose a man who is ready to do the work of being a husband. It is important to identify the qualities we are looking for in a husband, not just discount men because of the negative aspects we find in them.
"Being able to identify the Godly character in a man is your strongest tool for recognizing the man the Lord has sent you," she said.
It is important, according to Pembleton, to trust in the Lord that he will bring the right person into your life. It is then up to you to recognize him.
"You have to trust that God will bring you the man who will love you and add value to your life," she said. "Every choice you make should be weighed by God's standards."
Things to look for in a good husband:
• He is willing to rise to the occasion of being a husband to you.
• He shares a common destiny with you.
• He's interested in you
• He's a man you can respect
Once you have found the right man and become a wife, it is time to change from being "a wife" to being "his wife". This means tailoring your thoughts to what your husband truly needs.
"It will take some time, but since marriage is a life-long commitment, you'll have more than enough time to learn about your husband and how you can help him best," she said.
Christine Pembleton believes she knows the secret to making your marriage last. In her book, Lord, I'm Ready to be a Wife (www.christinepembleton.com) (Josephine Communications); she shares her views of how to become a good Christian wife and the importance of finding the right man to marry.
There are 3 types of unmarried women, according to Pembleton. The single woman who is living her life for herself, the "married" unmarried woman who gives her boyfriends all the benefits of marriage without the commitment, and the "wife-in-waiting" who is ready to be a wife, but waiting until the actual marriage to act like one.
The single, unmarried woman lives her life the way she wants to. Any man she meets must fit himself into her life.
"This mindset preserves her life as a single woman and it works to keep her life where it should be - a life that fulfills her God-given destiny," she said.
The unmarried "married" woman acts as though she is married, but without the commitment. She washes his clothes, cooks his meals and may even engage in pre-marital sex because she loves him and wants to give him everything he "needs."
"She bases her life choices on what's important to him and his goals," she said.
The "wife-in-waiting" has a life of her own, but is flexible enough to meet her future husband partway in order to build a life together. She is willing to make huge adjustments in her life, but only for the benefit of a marriage license. It is the "wife-in-waiting" that a woman looking for a good Christian marriage should strive to be.
"A wife-in-waiting may wait a little longer for her husband and be frustrated with how
many men will try to challenge her standards," she said. "But when she meets a man who wants to be a husband to her, she'll have the best chance of having a happy marriage. And enjoying being a wife to one man, the man she'll prayerfully share the rest of her life with."
Pembleton believes that it is not enough to have the right mind-set to have a happy marriage; you must also make sure you choose a man who is ready to do the work of being a husband. It is important to identify the qualities we are looking for in a husband, not just discount men because of the negative aspects we find in them.
"Being able to identify the Godly character in a man is your strongest tool for recognizing the man the Lord has sent you," she said.
It is important, according to Pembleton, to trust in the Lord that he will bring the right person into your life. It is then up to you to recognize him.
"You have to trust that God will bring you the man who will love you and add value to your life," she said. "Every choice you make should be weighed by God's standards."
Things to look for in a good husband:
• He is willing to rise to the occasion of being a husband to you.
• He shares a common destiny with you.
• He's interested in you
• He's a man you can respect
Once you have found the right man and become a wife, it is time to change from being "a wife" to being "his wife". This means tailoring your thoughts to what your husband truly needs.
"It will take some time, but since marriage is a life-long commitment, you'll have more than enough time to learn about your husband and how you can help him best," she said.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
